Emotional masturbation in relationships

The popularization of psychology carries undoubted advantages, but, of course, there are also disadvantages. One of these disadvantages is that a person, having read an article or a popular science book, snatched a piece of some knowledge from it, tries to apply it to himself, without knowing the information in its entirety — for example, after reading articles about narcissists, he begins to find in himself signs of pathological narcissism, despite the fact that much deeper fundamental knowledge and practical experience are required to make a diagnosis, which should be carried out by a psychiatrist.

Or, for example, let’s take the popular idea from books and articles on psychology, which has become almost a rule, that a person should satisfy his emotional needs himself. So a woman, for example, who read about this, will feel inferior or codependent, because she has a need to communicate with her husband, which is not satisfied, since the husband spends most of his time at work, and when he comes home, he is isolated from her at the computer . She will try to “plug” this hole in her soul with something, but her internal conflict will only intensify, because the need to quench her thirst cannot be replaced with food.

As a result, this woman will become depressed or start an affair. But even in a new relationship, there is a risk that she will remain silent about her emotional needs, demonstrating to her partner pseudo-self-sufficiency, but in fact engaging in emotional masturbation through communication on social…